Amal Al-Sibai

Saudi Gazette

 

Ramadan has come and gone and Muslims miss it already. We miss that extra level of patience we had during Ramadan, reading pages and pages of the Holy Quran, waking up before dawn to pray and to call upon our Lord to have mercy upon us all. It seems that during Ramadan we were stronger, more caring towards others, and had a deeper fear and love of Allah at the same time.



It is a challenge to maintain what we have achieved during the blessed month and to make it last all year long until Ramadan comes again. The companions of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) felt this yearning and nostalgia for Ramadan, however their devotion and worship did not simmer down after the month ended, as is the case of most Muslims today.



Scholars, describing the relationship between the companions and Ramadan, said, “They used to ask Allah the Almighty six months before Ramadan to grant them long life so that they could reach Ramadan and they used to ask Allah the Almighty six months after Ramadan to accept their fasting.”



The son of Omar ibn Al-Khattab used to greet Ramadan, saying, “Welcome oh the month that purifies us from the sins.” So yes, of course we miss Ramadan.



This Ramadan was different, memorable, and a learning experience for my family because it was the first time for us to spend Ramadan outside the Kingdom in 12 years.  



I am a person who gets very stuck in a particular way of doing things and a set routine; I am resistant to change. You can imagine my reaction when my husband (with a scared half-smile on his face) announced a few months ago that we would spend Ramadan in the US. To say I made a little fuss is an understatement.



For me, Ramadan was my crystal bowl of dates, sprinkled with tahini (sesame seed) sauce, and my pot of Arabic coffee which my housemaid, Halima, prepares to perfection. It was clearing up the iftar meal quickly to rush off to my favorite mosque that I adamantly insist on going to for Taraweeh prayers every night. It was the mosque’s soft, red velvet carpet, the women aligned for prayer whom I had become acquainted with over the years, the supplication of the Imam that I had almost memorized, the stalls of candy outside that I would buy from for my youngest daughter. Ramadan was seeing more of my parents and my husband’s parents. It was cooking extra rice and chicken, served into smaller individual containers, and sending with my son outside to give to the roaming women and children who had no stable home. In response to my teary complaints, my husband said that Allah could be worshiped anywhere on this Earth (even if it meant performing the night prayers at a mosque other than my particular one in Jeddah), that we would find other ways to feed the needy, and he bought me a large supply of dates, Arabic coffee, and cardamom. And Halima was so kind to good-naturedly teach me how to make the coffee.  



We learned that Ramadan is truly a blessed time and it has a positive impact on people’s lives, no matter where you are.



Physically, fasting in Ohio was difficult because the summer days are long and hot; the sun sets at 9:15 p.m.



The first two days of Ramadan, my lips were parched and by the end of the day I felt my energy waning and I had dizzy spells. I was tired from all the housework with no domestic help, so I assigned chores to my children. I felt much better after I started taking a short nap in the afternoon, staying indoors when it was hot, and when I diligently implemented the advice of our Prophet (peace be upon him) when it comes to eating a proper pre-dawn meal to prepare for the fast.    



Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) said, “Eat sahoor (pre-dawn meal) for in sahoor there is blessing.”



The Prophet (peace be upon him) recommended to delay the sahoor meal until just before dawn so it can sustain the body for the next day, and after trying it, I found that it truly helps.



For performing the congregational prayers, we found a beautiful mosque, situated literally amidst tall green trees. The city where it stands is Sylvania, meaning ‘city of trees’. The Muslims of the community join together every night in prayer, and I found that it takes more devotion, commitment, and meditation to stay focused because the days are so long and the prayers are not over until after mid-night.  

 

Ramadan in the US taught me humility, respect for diverse cultures, and it taught me how to love others not because we share the same blood or work or social circles, but because we share the same faith. In prayer, each night my shoulder touches the shoulder of a sister who came from a different part of the world; from Algeria, Yemen, India, Pakistan, Malaysia, Indonesia, Iraq, Jordan, Egypt, Palestine, Somalia, and Sudan. Every morning I practiced remembering the names of the sisters I had met.



At first I was shy and taken aback by the way women greet each other at the mosque. It was not the casual nod of the head, smile, and murmur of ‘Asalamu Alaikum’ that I was accustomed to. It was a ceremonial, joyous ‘Asalamu Alaikum Sister!’ with a big hug that actually puts pressure on your rib cage but it makes you feel warm inside, safe, and welcome. We rapidly became known as the family visiting from Saudi Arabia and everyone was eager to give us directions to the Arabic food stores, involve us in community activities, and to invite us to attend lectures that bolstered our knowledge of and appreciation for Islam.



Opportunities to give in charity and to do good deeds were abound. Several renowned relief organizations frequented the Sylvania mosque to request humanitarian aid for the suffering Muslims in dire need in Syria, Palestine, Burma, and elsewhere. Ramadan is the month of generosity and the Muslims in the community knew that, so they donated whole-heartedly.



Ramadan is the month of the Holy Quran. The leaders at the mosque organized a Quran memorization competition for children of all ages to keep youngsters connected to the Book of Allah, rather than wasting their time watching TV and playing all summer. My 3 children participated in the competition and although only one of them won first place, I was happy that they had all read and revised parts of the Quran, and had filled my home with melodious recitations of the Quran that they had downloaded on my I-phone.     



We missed our relatives and the family gatherings back in Jeddah, but we did not feel homesick or lonely because we rarely ate iftar alone at home. Every weekend, the mosque hosted a community iftar sponsored by a generous donor; everyone was welcome. We sipped lentil soup, ate delicious food, enjoyed tea and sweets, and chatted with friends.



This Ramadan we learned that with hard work, sincerity, and cooperation Muslims can accomplish amazing things. Twenty years ago, what had started out as a handful of university students praying in a tiny room, was now a thriving community, a full-time school, Quran teaching institute, and a mosque so large that it opened its doors to 1,000 people for prayer on the morning of Eid.  



For the readers concerned with my coffee making experimentation, it was a success! My Arabic coffee was good, but not as good as Halima’s.